The awful lead up to my marvelous Miracle

At midnight I call Geoff and tell him. His voice broke in disbelief "Ooh you are kidding?" and he made the journey in to the hospital. The doc did a scan a few hours later and the news was a bit better. I was not as dilated s he thought as my waters were 'bulging' and made an hourglass shape so in the spec exam, he was not actually seeing my cervix like he thought. Doc advised it would still be a while, days... maybe a week. Geoff slept in a bean bag next to me in the labour ward 'holding room' that night and I was moved to the ward the next day. They put me in a room with 3 new mothers. It was my lowest day and I had a hissy fit at every midwife who walked past me to get me the hell out of that room as it was just not fair. One told me it was just the way public hospitals were. Another asked if I was bothered by the noise. Did they not know what I had just been told and could they not imagine what it was like hearing all the congratulations when you think you have to prepare yourself for the death of a soon to be born child? I didn't get moved for 24 hours and I knew it wasn't their fault. I just wanted something to be angry about and I knew I had a legitimate reason there so I took advantage of it to release all I was feeling. (You can't just have a meltdown coz you're going into super prem labour you know! ) I called my Mum and Dad and they were on the next flight over from NZ, just 2 weeks after leaving. The paed's came and talked to us about stats and outcomes which was really good. The stats and outcomes were crappy, but at least we felt informed. The doctors told us that before 26 weeks, it is our choice whether they resuss the baby. We told them we were in the middle of the continuum - if the doctors believed he had a chance, they were to do what they could. If not, we did not want to prolong his pain. We started feeling more positive and all the docs were talking like I could still go for weeks as long as I got no infection. All was rosy again and in my new ward room, the waiting game began again. I had had my 2 steriod injections to help his lungs. They hurt like nothing else but I would have done it every day for months if I had to. It felt like someone took a big stick, jabbed it at your thigh then dragged it slowly down your leg. Dad had to go back on Sunday but Mum stayed and I told her when I got to 25 wks she could leave as I would no longer be so scared. The next day I was told I had a temperature and my heart rate was 100+ About 1pm Mum, MIL and my little princess were visiting when the docs came round. "You have an infection and we need to get the baby out" I felt fine - "Ummm... like... when?" "We are just calling labour ward to see if there is space" Stupid frigging roller coaster started again, I thought and all 3 of us started bawling. I called husband and by the time he got there, labour ward had called to advise that it was all systems go. 24 weeks exactly. The day I thought I was going to be starting work again!