Dear Nico,
It has now been a year since you came home. It really was the best day ever, even knowing what I know now... about life and how it is. That day, the day Brooklyn was born and our wedding day. The day you were born, the joy that usually comes with childbirth was there to some extent but it was overshadowed by fear, uncertainty, doubt and worry.
Until the day you came home, it never really lifted. The heavy cloud dissappated to a light mist but it was always there. Every trip to the hospital, every application of the avaguard, every step through the glass doors into that NICU bubble... all a reminder that the rug could be pulled from under our feet at any moment and we could be dropped a few "bays" and the wait for your homecoming could be longer.
A year down the track, at almost 19 months old, I got to spend my first mothers day with my little family all together. You must have known it was important as you gave me a decent sleep and had a restful day. I was not well that weekend but when I got myself together, we took a drive down to Phillip Island to spend some time out as a family. This is a very rare occurance but again, you put on your best face and we had a great day at the chocolate factory and having Fish n Chips by the pier at San Remo. We got to see a seal diving for fish and tried to show you but we were to slow by the time we got you out of your chair, it didn't resurface anywhere we could see it.
As for the rest of the month, we have increased your solid food and mostly you enjoy it. Lumpy stuff still makes you gag though. Nights have been up and down, we have had some shockers where you like to ensure that I see every hour on the clock through the night. We have had some good ones where I have only gotten up once or twice. A few nights aog it was just once and while having a break from your bottle, Veuve came into your room to visit. She kept poking her head over the foot stool and had you in hysterics. My favourite sound in the whole world.
Love you my little man
Mama
It has now been a year since you came home. It really was the best day ever, even knowing what I know now... about life and how it is. That day, the day Brooklyn was born and our wedding day. The day you were born, the joy that usually comes with childbirth was there to some extent but it was overshadowed by fear, uncertainty, doubt and worry.
Until the day you came home, it never really lifted. The heavy cloud dissappated to a light mist but it was always there. Every trip to the hospital, every application of the avaguard, every step through the glass doors into that NICU bubble... all a reminder that the rug could be pulled from under our feet at any moment and we could be dropped a few "bays" and the wait for your homecoming could be longer.
A year down the track, at almost 19 months old, I got to spend my first mothers day with my little family all together. You must have known it was important as you gave me a decent sleep and had a restful day. I was not well that weekend but when I got myself together, we took a drive down to Phillip Island to spend some time out as a family. This is a very rare occurance but again, you put on your best face and we had a great day at the chocolate factory and having Fish n Chips by the pier at San Remo. We got to see a seal diving for fish and tried to show you but we were to slow by the time we got you out of your chair, it didn't resurface anywhere we could see it.
As for the rest of the month, we have increased your solid food and mostly you enjoy it. Lumpy stuff still makes you gag though. Nights have been up and down, we have had some shockers where you like to ensure that I see every hour on the clock through the night. We have had some good ones where I have only gotten up once or twice. A few nights aog it was just once and while having a break from your bottle, Veuve came into your room to visit. She kept poking her head over the foot stool and had you in hysterics. My favourite sound in the whole world.
Love you my little man
Mama
Beautiful, Karin. How you do this with everything that is going on, I don't know, but you are an amazing woman.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post.
ReplyDeletehappy homecoming anniversary little man.